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Jan. 2nd, 2017 10:03 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pageeaterA dear old friend placed hearts on my last entry here - and that in itself has gotten me back again. I like that she's reading my journal once in a while. I can say that about both the friends who have commented here. There are some whom visit me in other journals, that I would prefer to not be here. Is that petty and egocentric of me? Maybe. But guess what? Here I get to be as petty as I want - and egocentric as well. It doesn't mean I don't want to make new friends. I am ordinarily welcoming, though an introvert.
I only have a few minutes now but I want to talk about the illusion of Perfection - a common dis-ease for me. When something doesn't go as I set it up for myself... when flexibility is called for... when the Beatles old lament, "life is what happens when you're busy making other plans" hits, I go into stress. Stress causes physical reactions. Did you know that an overflow of histamine is a reactive body response to stress?
Of course I set up this week for abundant Perfection. My schedule was a thing of beauty to see --- on paper. But last night, before Monday even surfaced, two texts turned that plan all to hell and back. And the walk back was no fun at all. It required deep breaths and closed eyes before I responded to the texts. Both asked me to do things I love - a day with my granddaughter, a late tea or early dinner with a good friend. But it meant the perfect plan had to be adjusted... which meant to my habitual self that my Perfection for the week was thwarted before it even began. And on the first week of this brand new year! And the year is the universal cycle of 'One'. Just past the very turmoil-filled universal '9' year - 2016. I don't even want to say 2016 ever again.
But here's the thing. One of the big lessons for me is to reduce stress I didn't even know I had. Because it came from my Perfection not panning out. I didn't recognize it. And though I've known for years that attaining the "Art of Imperfection" was a worthy goal, I just could not get myself to bite in. Last night I did bite in. I graciously accepted both the advent of a day with my beloved granddaughter in the middle of this week and tea-time at a local café with my friend this very afternoon. Then I carefully rearranged my Perfect schedule, realizing that it might or it might not work out. And either way is okay.
I only have a few minutes now but I want to talk about the illusion of Perfection - a common dis-ease for me. When something doesn't go as I set it up for myself... when flexibility is called for... when the Beatles old lament, "life is what happens when you're busy making other plans" hits, I go into stress. Stress causes physical reactions. Did you know that an overflow of histamine is a reactive body response to stress?
Of course I set up this week for abundant Perfection. My schedule was a thing of beauty to see --- on paper. But last night, before Monday even surfaced, two texts turned that plan all to hell and back. And the walk back was no fun at all. It required deep breaths and closed eyes before I responded to the texts. Both asked me to do things I love - a day with my granddaughter, a late tea or early dinner with a good friend. But it meant the perfect plan had to be adjusted... which meant to my habitual self that my Perfection for the week was thwarted before it even began. And on the first week of this brand new year! And the year is the universal cycle of 'One'. Just past the very turmoil-filled universal '9' year - 2016. I don't even want to say 2016 ever again.
But here's the thing. One of the big lessons for me is to reduce stress I didn't even know I had. Because it came from my Perfection not panning out. I didn't recognize it. And though I've known for years that attaining the "Art of Imperfection" was a worthy goal, I just could not get myself to bite in. Last night I did bite in. I graciously accepted both the advent of a day with my beloved granddaughter in the middle of this week and tea-time at a local café with my friend this very afternoon. Then I carefully rearranged my Perfect schedule, realizing that it might or it might not work out. And either way is okay.
